Unhealthy effects of overriding emotions
Sometimes emotions arise when you're in a state and place to feel them and give your full attention to them. But often times, you may need to put them on hold for a bit.
Just like how you don't want to have a pile of laundry in the middle of the living room when you're hosting a dinner party, sometimes you're in situations where you don't want to / is not a good idea to have your emotions at the front and centre.
Fine, so, you put them away.
Bottle them up, sweep it away, under the rug, suppress, ignore, distract, move on.
But these feelngs don't actually go away, they accumulate, build up, get bigger, heavier, and produce more problems that come from not addressing them in the first place!
If, on the other hand, you do make time to sort through your emotional reactions/responses, it's like folding and putting laundry away. It helps to sort things out and get a clearer picture of what you want to do with them.
3 steps to creating space for emotions
1. Set aside time - This is probably the hardest! But do this, and the next few steps will be much easier. Schedule time both alone and with support () to reflect, gain awareness, and to do an inventory of all that's been bottled up over the week, months, years.
2. Curiosty - Your feelings are real, but they may not be accurate. So, investigate with openness, with curious observation, instead of with a judgement that they are bad and ought to be rid.
3. Feel in your body - Your emotions have a home, and it's your body. Creating room for your emotions involves noticing what they feel like in your body. Notice what is your (physical) reality right now.
It is safe for you to feel
In a world where it's either inappropriate to feel (don't make a scene), or too unsafe to feel ("you're being too sensitive"), to busy to feel (where got time?!), it's no wonder there's a stark rise in mental health issues from anxiety and depression, to burnout, and other chronic ailments.
But that has to change.
After being shrunk into the confines of my mind for decades (that's what unresolved emotional wounding does to you), my healing journey took me straight into my body and through a combination of therapy, practice, courage, and self-compassion, I now wholeheartedly believe in the importance of emotional health, which begins with simply feeling our feelings.
My stress levels have dropped tremendously, I parent with less mom-guilt, totally changed the way I see myself, and the cherry on top, taken my approach to relationships to a whole nother level.
“✨Wisdom comes from the ability to be still. Just look and listen. No more is needed. Being still, looking, and listening activates the non-conceptual intelligence within you. Let stillness direct your words and actions✨”